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| Lately, I have been feeling so inspired. I've been reading many of Dworkin's writings, and I saw the last Anti-Product show, on video. Let me tell you. The singer of Anti-Product is such an amazing inspirational woman. I saw it on VIDEO and it made me cry.
It just goes to show that so many women are finding that piece of themselves, that allows them to feel strong and beautiful. And though I preach all of this shit about women loving themselves, I loathe myself. What a fucking joke.
I guess it comes down to loving others more than myself. Hoping that others can find that happiness. | | |
| I got a new baby rat. I still have Crapbag, too.
The new rat is so tiny. Her name is Socks.
I got a job, working at a pharmacy. I only make 6.50 an hour, but it's something. And all I have to do is work a month, and I should have all of my fees paid off with Karey.
My hours are pretty good, too.
Mon-Fri = 11-7
Sat/Sun off.
So yeah. It's pretty good.
Other than that, I'm pretty bored. Waiting to see if Cori's gonna call me. I got some new pictures.
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| =[
cori might have crohn's disease. | | |
| Ugh. There's some kind of stupid fucking tropical storm and I fucking hate it.
I fucking hate everything.
I always fucking cry for no reason.
And you always think I'm mad at you.
I'm never fucking mad at you.
I'm just mad at myself.
Cori has surgery today. He called and invited me but then his mom said there'd be no room for me in the hospital room so now I'm staying home.
I wish he had never even fucking called and invited me because now I feel like fucking shit.
I always feel like fucking shit.
Man, fuck life.
I still haven't heard a damn thing from fucking Target.
I'm never going to get a fucking job.
Everyone and everything can suck my fucking asshole. | | |
| I wonder if anybody really knows who they are. If anyone has truly found themselves. If so, I'd imagine that to be the most amazing feeling in the world. Feeling so absolutely comfortable with yourself.
Maybe it's not even possible.
I finally got a job at Target [cashier], working with Cori! =]
Right now I'm just waiting for them to get my urine test results back, and do my background check. Then, I'm hired.
Cori had surgery a few days ago, but he's doing great now.
I hope I can start working soon, because life has become so monotonous, and I owe my drug counselor over 700$. It's fucking rediculous.
She asked me to think about how much money I spent on drugs, but I'm going to spend way more for "treatment."
I have 2 months left of probation. It's amazing how fast time flies by.
I just got done reading Go Ask Alice. It was rather depressing. The epilogue said that 3 weeks or so after she made her last diary entry, she died. I thought the whole book was garbage, so I looked it up. Pretty much, the book is fiction, even though it's supposed to be a diary her parents found after she died.
I was still kind of shocked by the death. | | |
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